Old School – 2 – NuSkool
What are the two halves
that make me whole.
Trapped in the middle that is looked
at as a crisis
No it’s not a midwife, nor an old maid.
more like a bad boy and a new man.
Trapped in a midlife can’t seem to get it
right.
already done been in a fight
Standing tall on top of a mole hill
or is it a mountain. Lookin’ down
not smiling like a clown more like a
tear drop on my son’s cheek.
I look at these two halves and plainly see
that they make up the whole me.
Totally different yet two of a kind.
See one is a younger body, that’s me, two is
an older mind strengthened by wisdom you see.
Yes, two of a kind yet not same suited
Two halves that make up the whole me ya see.
~CM
Untitled
Now I’m proudly half Hispanic and proud half Native American
I’m loved by half my family but by the other half I’m hated
Because I’m what’s known as a coyote, a half breed
and after my dad died his side of the family decided to forget me
so I’ve lived half my life upon this world as just another statistic, a homeless teen,
from the age of 13
While at the same time trying to avoid becoming
a dead statistic of those same streets
Half of my mind is haunted by the worst half of my past
And I know that I’ll probably never be able to forget that
But the other half of my mind just won’t accept that
so now the battle remains
an inner conflict between love, hate, and pain
So many conflicting emotions running through my mind
Past, present and a fear of the future, collide
Half of me wants to hate the world for condemning me
But the other half wants to thank them for strengthening me
Even though everything in my life up until this point, has been disproportionate
looked down upon my whole life and labeled as one of the less fortunate
Although I’m not, I’m just caught up in a system,
that’s in the business of extortion
Because in this place you ain’t going nowhere if you don’t have the money
for a lawyer
Dam-nant-quad-non-in-telli-gunt,
They condemn what they do not understand
If they only knew I was just a broken-hearted kid,
who did the best with what he had.
Because this heart carries the blood of my mother and the blood of my father
And you best believe that neither of them carried the blood line of a coward
So yeah, I might be a half breed, but all that means
Is I have the strength of two razas behind me
Half of me loves Navajo tacos the other half loves enchiladas
Just like half of me will always love fry bread and the other half sopapillas
Blessed with my mom’s smarts and my dad’s kind-hearted nature
I’ll never forget who they were
The halves that make me whole.
~CG
One Half’s Dying as my Other Half Lives
The behavior as a disobedient child
those choices of an irresponsible adult
results of this being
my one half that is dying.
The energetic child full of dreams and goals
the striving adult shooting for success
positive in life making his way
this being my other half that lives
Those words of wisdom and advice
from my loving and caring father
with my selfish pride I seldom used, yet have not forgotten
“Don’t leave your bike in the driveway
it’ll get ran over”
“Mi hijo stay away from marijuana
it ain’t worth a shit”
“Don’t dig yourself a hole you cannot get out of”
Unaware of its fate one half begins fighting to live
Living reckless showing no respect
blinded by foolishness living for the moment
As a know-it-all teenager being gone for days
resulting not in a whipping but a lecture from dad
a scolding of few words
yet very serious
Living under his roof
I will live by his rules
To disobey his orders
I’m told there’s the road
In choosing the road
my other half begins dying
My loving mother so kind and supportive
believing in her only son
knows me like the back of her hand
telling me
“you’re not the same mi hijo, is everything ok?”
I claim nothing’s wrong
with a doubtful look she comments
“it’s your life.”
Not knowing the time or place
consequences await
Falling into the hands of the law
strict laws with no mercy
with the legal system in full control
12 to 18 months no longer apply
Enforced on the habitual offender
is that of a mandatory sentence
reaching the point, that’s totally exhausting
my one half willingly must fight to live
Like an angel
Gordon Bernell Charter School awakens that child
that combined
with words from the very heart and soul
JustWrite poetry
motivates and inspires my halves to live
~OM
JustWrite 